Path: mit-eddie!mintaka!think!zaphod.mps.ohio-state.edu!swrinde!cs.utexas.edu!uunet!shelby!lindy!news From: GE.LJB@forsythe.stanford.edu (Louis J Bookbinder) Newsgroups: alt.callahans Subject: Silverback''s Axe Message-ID: <8290@lindy.Stanford.EDU> Date: 2 Mar 90 18:36:08 GMT Sender: news@lindy.Stanford.EDU (News Service) Lines: 79 clank, clank, CLANK, CLANK! Nick Chopper makes his customary noisy entry to Callahan's. In one quick motion he slaps a silver dollar on the bar and comes away with a small glass of oily liquid in his metal hand. He walks over to Silverback at a well-occupied table, drinking decaf with friends. "For a moment, there, I thought you had found my silver axe! This is terrible! This is no fun at all! If I wouldn't rust I would sit with you and cry tears and drink decaf till I float! "One of the worst times in my life was when I lost my job. Actually, it happened twice - the first time was bloody, the second sad and a little desparate. "The first time my boss and I were getting some rather heated differences of opinion and one day we started calling names, and then I decided that 2 more times I would quit and 5 minutes later he called me in and fired me. I was glad to get out, but couldn't afford to, really. Rats. I hated him and myself for months afterward. "The second time I worked for a company which helped (for a fee) various police and penal organizations in computerizing some of their operations. They got over half of their money from the Feds. Almost to a man they were Reagan supporters and thought I was totally weird to support Carter. Reagan won and immediately announced cuts in the Criminal Justice funding and our company suddenly had to downsize. It was almost poetic justice, to force the pun! But I had to find a job, fast, my wife was pregnant! So I found one here at Stanford, not the best work, but great place to work and terrific people. Salary was also pretty good. I got the best of the deal, I think, but had to give up a nice home in Sacramento for the hovel I live in now (5 people in a 3-bedroom, 1 bath, 40-year-old tract house. Well, it keeps the rain off our heads) "But mainly I remember the horrible feeling, not unlike stepping off a cliff, like the ground suddenly dropping out from under. You want to grab at anything. You want to cry. You want to scream at the idiots who put together this damn uncivilization! "Mostly you want to cry. It's SO UNFAIR! You were so loyal, so dedicated, so willing to pull for the team, and they slap you and boot you out!. "I am sorry, I really am. The next few months will be really hard for you, not just financially, but psychically. Don't convince yourself that you are worthless, or any less than the best professional anybody could ask for. Your credentials are truly awesome! I AM HUMBLED! You should have no problem getting an even better job. This will not, of course, negate the shocking pain you will experience until your new job materializes, but it should help maintain hope. "Please keep sharing with us as long as you are able, and we will try to help." Nick slurps in the oily stuff, turns quizically to Mike. "Mink Oil" "Not bad - a littly slimy. Oh, well..." He walks to the line. "I still haven't found my axe. Maybe I don't want it. Heck, I don't know! I want to keep this job and writing to A.C takes time from my job. I want us all to keep our jobs, or at least to get another one we are happy with. These are troubling times. Everything has changed, just when the Conservative Establishment finally lulled most of us into thinking we had it made and everything would now stay in these happy conditions. Nuts! Complacency is the enemy of wisdom. Blindness to change is fatal. But adjusting to change and planning for uncertainty is never easy. "To the uncertain future! May we meet it head-on, despite major concussions, and eventually conquer it (only to find still more uncertainty to come!)" **Crash** "Thanx, Mike. Good luck, Silverback!" CLANK!, CLANK, Clank, clank, slam Nick Chopper - my opinion? dont ax! LB>- GE.LJB@Forsythe.stanford.edu Path: mit-eddie!mit-amt!snorkelwacker!apple!brutus.cs.uiuc.edu!samsung!uunet!shelby!lindy!news From: GE.LJB@forsythe.stanford.edu (Louis J Bookbinder) Newsgroups: alt.callahans Subject: Silverback Message-ID: <8288@lindy.Stanford.EDU> Date: 2 Mar 90 18:34:51 GMT Sender: news@lindy.Stanford.EDU (News Service) Lines: 79 clank, clank, CLANK, CLANK! Nick Chopper makes his customary noisy entry to Callahan's. In one quick motion he slaps a silver dollar on the bar and comes away with a small glass of oily liquid in his metal hand. He walks over to Silverback at a well-occupied table, drinking decaf with friends. "For a moment, there, I thought you had found my silver axe! This is terrible! This is no fun at all! If I wouldn't rust I would sit with you and cry tears and drink decaf till I float! "One of the worst times in my life was when I lost my job. Actually, it happened twice - the first time was bloody, the second sad and a little desparate. "The first time my boss and I were getting some rather heated differences of opinion and one day we started calling names, and then I decided that 2 more times I would quit and 5 minutes later he called me in and fired me. I was glad to get out, but couldn't afford to, really. Rats. I hated him and myself for months afterward. "The second time I worked for a company which helped (for a fee) various police and penal organizations in computerizing some of their operations. They got over half of their money from the Feds. Almost to a man they were Reagan supporters and thought I was totally weird to support Carter. Reagan won and immediately announced cuts in the Criminal Justice funding and our company suddenly had to downsize. It was almost poetic justice, to force the pun! But I had to find a job, fast, my wife was pregnant! So I found one here at Stanford, not the best work, but great place to work and terrific people. Salary was also pretty good. I got the best of the deal, I think, but had to give up a nice home in Sacramento for the hovel I live in now (5 people in a 3-bedroom, 1 bath, 40-year-old tract house. Well, it keeps the rain off our heads) "But mainly I remember the horrible feeling, not unlike stepping off a cliff, like the ground suddenly dropping out from under. You want to grab at anything. You want to cry. You want to scream at the idiots who put together this damn uncivilization! "Mostly you want to cry. It's SO UNFAIR! You were so loyal, so dedicated, so willing to pull for the team, and they slap you and boot you out!. "I am sorry, I really am. The next few months will be really hard for you, not just financially, but psychically. Don't convince yourself that you are worthless, or any less than the best professional anybody could ask for. Your credentials are truly awesome! I AM HUMBLED! You should have no problem getting an even better job. This will not, of course, negate the shocking pain you will experience until your new job materializes, but it should help maintain hope. "Please keep sharing with us as long as you are able, and we will try to help." Nick slurps in the oily stuff, turns quizically to Mike. "Mink Oil" "Not bad - a littly slimy. Oh, well..." He walks to the line. "I still haven't found my axe. Maybe I don't want it. Heck, I don't know! I want to keep this job and writing to A.C takes time from my job. I want us all to keep our jobs, or at least to get another one we are happy with. These are troubling times. Everything has changed, just when the Conservative Establishment finally lulled most of us into thinking we had it made and everything would now stay in these happy conditions. Nuts! Complacency is the enemy of wisdom. Blindness to change is fatal. But adjusting to change and planning for uncertainty is never easy. "To the uncertain future! May we meet it head-on, despite major concussions, and eventually conquer it (only to find still more uncertainty to come!)" **Crash** "Thanx, Mike. Good luck, Silverback!" CLANK!, CLANK, Clank, clank, slam Nick Chopper - my opinion? dont ax! LB>- GE.LJB@Forsythe.stanford.edu Path: mit-eddie!mintaka!think!yale!cs.utexas.edu!tut.cis.ohio-state.edu!ucbvax!fsdcupt.csd.mot.COM!jane From: jane@fsdcupt.csd.mot.COM (Jane Beckman x4030) Newsgroups: alt.callahans Subject: Author, author! Message-ID: <9003021202.AA03519@fsdcupt.csd.mot.COM> Date: 2 Mar 90 20:02:58 GMT Sender: daemon@ucbvax.BERKELEY.EDU Lines: 10 Jilara grins. "Well, actually, I was kind of hoping that someone might come up with another alternative. I'd kind of like to remember ME. (Okay, so my stuff is small potatoes now; I'm working on making it bigger and better.) I just hope I can make it without Steele-ing ideas. By the way, does not adhering to Darwin's Origin of the Species make you a Lamarcked man?" ---Jilara the Exile e-mail roulette path under con(de?)struction Path: mit-eddie!snorkelwacker!tut.cis.ohio-state.edu!ucbvax!fsdcupt.csd.mot.COM!jane From: jane@fsdcupt.csd.mot.COM (Jane Beckman x4030) Newsgroups: alt.callahans Subject: Jobs and Mutual Support Message-ID: <9003021539.AA02250@fsdcupt.csd.mot.COM> Date: 2 Mar 90 23:39:32 GMT Sender: daemon@ucbvax.BERKELEY.EDU Lines: 49 Jilara gives Silverblack a hug. "Hang in there, my friend. I've been in that position a few too many times. As a matter of fact, before I got my present position (which I've been in 8+ years and need to leave for more potential and to hopefully make a living wage again...) I had been out of work for almost six months, and was on the verge of going down for the third time. That was the worst, and may be the only reason why I've grimly hung onto my present position as long as I have. But still, these things often ultimately turn out of the best---although it sure doesn't feel that way at the time! A former boss of mine got laid off a few years ago, and it was the best thing, ultimately, for his finances and his general enjoyment of life, because he got into some much better stuff that he liked much more. But he was in shock and feeling pretty down for the first few days. Of course, I hope that some of the good folks here in Callahans can put you onto some tips, too---that's the best way to check on these things, if people give you tips on opportunities they know about. I've done a bit of this sort of thing for a couple people here, myself. Nothing's panned out, so far, but every little bit helps, I figure. Again, it's what makes Callahans so special, that people care, are willing to offer help, support, whatever." She looks around the n-cornered room. "I love you all, you know," she says softly, "for being who and what you are, for making this place---well---Callahans. A few miracles have happened here, which I reserve for another post, and I notice I don't NEED the place the way I once did. But I want to keep hanging around (despite the &%$*(**&%!! difficulties with the net and my mail!) to be there for those who need an Auntie Jilara (a role I'm very good at!) or a sympathetic listener." She smiles wistfully at Silverblack. "That's all I can be for you, a sympathetic listener, since I don't think there are any great opportunities in overpriced California I can steer you into. But oh, can I empathize! Three of my dear friends were laid off around Christmas (happy holidays!), and I fret over their fortunes a bit, too." She gets up and wanders strides purposefully over to the bar. "Mike, I'll set up a round for anyone who is out of work or about to be so. As for me, I'm crossing my fingers on a job I'm interviewing for, because it's a good position and a great advancement in salary for me, and I'm tired of doing the equivalent of a GS12 job for GS4 pay (for those who understand government rankings, even tho I don't work for the government). I hope it doesn't mean I'll have to give up my net access and Callahans, though. But if it does, I'll find a way to drop by. Gods Teeth, I sound like I expect to have it, already!" She motions anyone who fits her criteria to come up to the bar and give Mike their orders. Picking up her glass of scotch, she marches over to the chalk line. "To employment! May it bring us whatever we seek!" She drains the glass and smashes it into the fire. "There haven't been enough toasts in here, lately!" she mutters, turning away. "NEXT!" ---Jilara the Exile, possible mail path: @urbana.mcd.mot.com.jane@fsdcupt.csd ---no guarantees! Path: mit-eddie!bbn!granite!mandel From: mandel@granite.cr.bull.com (Mark Mandel) Newsgroups: alt.callahans Subject: Re: Jobs and Mutual Support Message-ID: <1990Mar3.023031.29173@granite.cr.bull.com> Date: 3 Mar 90 02:30:31 GMT References: <9003021539.AA02250@fsdcupt.csd.mot.COM> Reply-To: mandel@granite.cr.bull.com (Mark Mandel) Organization: Bull HN Information Systems Inc. Lines: 37 (Silverblack looks rather more solid than he did earlier in the day, and he has his color back.) Nick, Jilara: * T H A N K Y O U *. (A big hug that has one arm around each of them. ) I sort of hit the ground running, once I had taken an hour or so to come out of the shock and call my wife. We were sort of expecting this. The rumor mill at this place has been going hot and heavy, and the past three Thursday nights one or the other of us has had nightmares, or waked up and not gotten back to sleep, or both. Now at least the uncertainty is over. I am going to type my resume into this machine over the weekend so I can post it in an appropriate place or two. (I have it made up on a Mac at the office; I don't think I can transfer it.) I don't remember exactly what I said in my post this morning, so I may be about to repeat myself, repeat myself. I may lose access to this machine soon, but a friend or two will be able to listen for me. I hope to be able to at least hear what's said, even if I am only a shadowy presence. Mark Mandel, a.k.a. Silverblack ^ (A silverback is an old male gorilla... come to think of it, I have a placemat that shows one such looking mad and red-eyed, and captioned "Patience, hell, i'm going to go out there and KILL something!" Some days I feel that way. Maybe it's a useful way to feel these days.) /* My employer disclaims all responsibility for me, and vice versa. */ -- -- Mark Mandel (InterNet: Mandel@granite.cr.bull.com) /* My employer is not responsible for anything I say, do, think, or eat. */ Path: mit-eddie!snorkelwacker!apple!mips!zaphod.mps.ohio-state.edu!swrinde!ucsd!ucbvax!ucdavis!csusac!yarnot From: yarnot@csusac.csus.edu (Jan Yarnot) Newsgroups: alt.callahans Subject: *cackle* Message-ID: <1990Mar3.063313.1239@csusac.csus.edu> Date: 3 Mar 90 06:33:13 GMT Distribution: usa Organization: California State University, Sacramento Lines: 30 A little old white-headed lady toddles up to the bar from the shadowy niche where she's been listening. You get the feeling she hasn't missed much. "A sarsaparilla, sonny!" she croaks to a mildly astonished Mike, handing over, oh-so-shakily, her dollar. "What author?" she asks Gary. "Ha! most of what I read is mysteries and SF, and a lot of dreadful hack-work it is, too. I'd probably like to commemorate Ruth Plumley Thompson, who took the Oz books beyond the 14 that L. Frank Baum was forced to turn out (oh, why not? I'd do his Oz books, too, but please please spare me his other works!) into new depths of punnery and imagination." She looks around. The regulars all look so young and untried. "In my day, kiddies, you got character from adversity. The cowboys' hats took on dirt and dents from being used, and the cowboys themselves took on wrinkles and scars, and it showed that they had _experienced_ something. Nowadays you young whip- persnappers want all the answers without having to suffer for them. You want the Cliff's Notes to life. Take it from an old bat. All this pain and suffer- ing will be worth it if you learn from it. Growing hurts, no question. But not-growing is death. "There will be True Love for each of you, if you are learning from these not-quite-but-almost-True relationships. The Great Thing is that you have helpers along the way: your parents (yes indeed, sonny. I try to be there for my kids) if you'll take it, your clergy-person, school counsellors, or a full-blown professional. And these here folks at Callahans. They care. Heck. I care, too. Don't you forget it." With that, she creaks up to the hearth and drops her glass into the fireplace: "To fantasy!" the crone croaks, and slowly, arthritically, makes her way back to her shadowed table. Path: mit-eddie!wuarchive!cs.utexas.edu!uunet!microsoft!ellene From: ellene@microsoft.UUCP (Ellen EADES) Newsgroups: alt.callahans Subject: Re: soulmates Message-ID: <52025@microsoft.UUCP> Date: 2 Mar 90 23:09:01 GMT Organization: Microsoft Corp., Redmond WA Lines: 31 The dark-haired woman sitting at Kathy's table snorts and looks up from her iced coffee. "You're worried about the odds against finding someone who just might live in China and/or intersect with a bus? Geez, at least you can contemplate finding one. "Who the heck has time for this romance nonsense once they're out of college? Look, I work full-time. I perform on THAT thing --" jerking a foot at the enormous hammer dulcimer poking out from under the table between herself and Kathy "--at least once a week. I teach between two and ten students, an hour apiece every other week. I'm taking a singing class and two dance classes. Once in a while someone has got to clean the kitchen. Weekends get spent on recording projects, room reorganizations, cat-food treks, and the occasional concert. Maybe I'll even say ten words to my housemate. "Looked at one way, I've got it twice as easy as you all, since I'm not specifying gender for my special friend. And I don't see why, if you assume there's one special person out there for you, you can't as easily assume there are three or four or a dozen. But who the heck has TIME to go looking? And anyway, I'm sharp and aggressive enough that I scare off eighty percent of the men -- another ten percent are puppies and psychic vampires -- and all the women want me to make the first move. Man, I don't have time for that song-and-dance. "Woops. I gotta run, I'm late for the 'Potluck' show at MOHAI. Hey, Kathy, thanks for the drink, sis. Mike, when are you gonna put up a stage here in the corner for me?" She hoists the dulcimer with a grunt and heads out into the spring rain. Path: mit-eddie!snorkelwacker!tut.cis.ohio-state.edu!ucbvax!CCB.UCSF.EDU!robin From: robin@CCB.UCSF.EDU (Robin Colgrove) Newsgroups: alt.callahans Subject: Tomorrow and the UNO Message-ID: <9003040627.AA08875@ccb.ucsf.EDU> Date: 4 Mar 90 06:27:33 GMT Sender: daemon@ucbvax.BERKELEY.EDU Lines: 27 In deep discussion with a curly-haired young woman decked out in the trendiest early 22nd century orbital fashions, Robin gesticulates earnestly with his beer glass, slurping foam onto her heretofore imaculate air seals. "Oops, sorry bout that. But y'know I still say the Nicaraguan opposition missed a golden opportunity for a campaign song by not appropriating the show-stopper from 'Annie' for their own uses. You know: [he breaks into wobbly melody] Chaaaa- MOR- Ro, Chamorro ! Queremos Chamorro! Y todo sera' mejor... He stops the refrain, finding himself staring into the barrel of her micro rail-gun, clearly set for "shred" "Ok, Ok, it was just a thought! Don't be so touchy!!" she throws her head back and laughs, the light glinting sharply off the star and eagle insignia of the central american oribtal command. She hoists his beer, drains it expertly, then lobs it over the heads of surrounding patrons toward the fireplace. At the last instant, she stands, whirls round, and blasts the glass into splinters with the r-gun while the glass was just centimeters form the back wall of the fireplace. In a mocking gesture toward her primitive environs, she blows across the top of the "barrel" as if her weapon would ever emit anything as crude as smoke... "A La Democracia!" She exclaims, and disappears nimbly through the nearest time portal. Path: mit-eddie!snorkelwacker!tut.cis.ohio-state.edu!rutgers!cbmvax!vu-vlsi!nlp From: nlp@vu-vlsi.Villanova.EDU (Nick Pine) Newsgroups: alt.callahans Subject: Re: WHAT AUTHOR I WOULD BE Message-ID: <231@vu-vlsi.Villanova.EDU> Date: 3 Mar 90 13:25:43 GMT References: <8256@lindy.Stanford.EDU> Reply-To: nlp@vu-vlsi.UUCP (Nick Pine) Organization: Villanova Univ. EE Dept. Lines: 2 Hmmm. Bertrand Russell, A. J. Ayer, W. V. O. Quine, Pierre Delattre, Roald Dahl, Robert Sheckley, . . .